


and sometimes i feel like my own friends are keeping things from me

by youriko



Category: Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, suicide TW
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 19:53:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10838268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youriko/pseuds/youriko
Summary: after two years.





	and sometimes i feel like my own friends are keeping things from me

**Author's Note:**

> another twitter request! request ships from here: listography.com/elimaki (in the ongoing section~)

Dia wouldn’t look at her. Ever since she came back, she’d avoid her gaze, looking at the ground or some other person she needed to scold. It sent a spike of anger through her, especially since she looked guilty.

 

Mari was the one who was sent away by her and Kanan, unwanted. They threw away her dream for some shitty transfer school; did they really think she wanted that? All she wanted was to do something with her dear friends, and they wouldn’t talk to her now that she’s come back. They didn’t want her.

 

So they didn’t so much as look at her. It hurt more when it was Dia, though. It was all Kanan’s plan, to send her away, not so much Dia. She was just a follower, and yet, she still wouldn’t make eye contact. Mari wanted to grab her and force her to look into her eyes, just once, so she could feel like she wasn’t invisible.

 

She’d sit on her balcony, staring at the stars, waiting for them to come; as they always did; but they didn’t. She was alone with the stars, and sometimes she might’ve felt like taking her pills and shoving a few hundred down her throat, since if they didn’t care for her, who could?

 

It was a night like that. Instead of the stars, her eyes were locked onto the pill bottle on the nightstand, looking from the other side of her bed. She was so tired of crying, so tired of feeling worthless. Feeling nothing at all would be better, she was sure.

 

Maybe coming back wasn’t a great idea. Maybe it would be better, for everyone, if she was dead. Maybe a lot of things, but she knew, for a fact, how it felt for her heart to break.

 

“Mari?”

 

The pills were in her hand, and she was so close, so close to release, and it was ruined forever. Ruined. She’d be sent to some psychiatric facility, and thrown out of the family, out of the Ohara name, and no one would love her, though what was new?

 

She dropped them onto the bed, praying the servant would go away, and laid down. No servant would care enough to come help her.

 

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my-” A crash was heard behind her, and normally she’d report it to her father so the servant could be fired, but maybe if she had this leverage….

 

“Don’t mention it, and I won’t get you fired,” Mari snapped.

 

“....”

 

“Say it,” Mari said, voice shaking a bit. Gripping the sheets, she pulled them closer to her. “You won’t tell him. Say it.”

 

“You really don’t recognize me, do you?”

 

Her breath caught. Of course, life was to be so cruel.

 

“....Dia?” She turned around, speaking softly.

 

Dia approached the bed slowly, eyes switching from the dropped pills to Mari. Her eyes were watering, face sunken in, not as kept up as it is during the day, but no less beautiful. “What…” she started hoarsely, “happened to you?”

 

“Get out,” Mari answered in a weak snarl.

 

“Mari, please, I need to help you-”

 

“I don’t need any help from you,” Mari spat, anger coming back in full force. “Get the fuck out.”

 

Dia shook her head, reaching out a hand, one Mari shrank back from. If it was possible, Dia’s face fell even more, and Mari hated herself for it. “You can’t- I can’t just not tell anyone, Mari.”

 

“That’s exactly what you’ll do.”

 

In response, Dia hugged her full force, arms wrapped around her. Tears fell onto her shoulders from blue eyes, dampening her pajamas. Mari stayed frozen, receiving, but not returning, until she tentatively put her arms on Dia’s shoulders, burying her face into her chest.

  
And she cried, and she probably cried for hours on end, because there was just so much and then there was Dia, always her savior.


End file.
